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Old 04-09-2009, 05:49 PM   #51 (permalink)
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Hi Grace,
hope all is well. We had a conference today with my attorney myself and the other side of this mess. We were looking to settle some items prior to us going to court. Now we bothe agreed on selling the house. Now what her lawyer is trying to do is raise the child support from what I am currently paying to a higher figure because of one of my pay stubs that she took which had a significant amount of overtime and at the time no one had health insurance. Now my question is with my real salary which only has 40 hrs a week with no overtime, how do they think that I can pay a mortgage and child support because the numbers do not add up. Overtime is not promised at work and they are going by a pay stub that is not valid.
Is your lawyer going to challenge this?? Of course, they shouldnt use just one paystub. Did your lawyer say anything about this?

What is happening regarding the adoption? Are the children still with her? Are you going to be paying child support for the foster child as well? I don't know how the divorce CAN proceed without settling the issue of the child's adoption FIRST.
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Old 04-09-2009, 06:22 PM   #52 (permalink)
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Is your lawyer going to challenge this?? Of course, they shouldnt use just one paystub. Did your lawyer say anything about this?

What is happening regarding the adoption? Are the children still with her? Are you going to be paying child support for the foster child as well? I don't know how the divorce CAN proceed without settling the issue of the child's adoption FIRST.
My lawyer is going to challenge this. She did say that I would have to con't to pay until we go in front of a judge. Now it seems that she covered herself by filing for divorce before the adoption issue can come into play. She is claiming abandonment and cruel and inhuman treatment. According to my lawyer we have to settle this case first before moving on to the next.
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Old 04-10-2009, 01:00 PM   #53 (permalink)
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My lawyer is going to challenge this. She did say that I would have to con't to pay until we go in front of a judge. Now it seems that she covered herself by filing for divorce before the adoption issue can come into play. She is claiming abandonment and cruel and inhuman treatment. According to my lawyer we have to settle this case first before moving on to the next.
Your lawyer says you have to settle the divorce BEFORE you address the adoption? or vise versa?
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Old 04-13-2009, 03:24 PM   #54 (permalink)
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Your lawyer says you have to settle the divorce BEFORE you address the adoption? or vise versa?
She is going to take care of the divorce before the adoption.
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Old 04-13-2009, 05:20 PM   #55 (permalink)
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She is going to take care of the divorce before the adoption.
That surprises me because it would seem to be impossible to address the issue of child support without addressing paternity/custody, etc.
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Old 04-14-2009, 01:25 PM   #56 (permalink)
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That surprises me because it would seem to be impossible to address the issue of child support without addressing paternity/custody, etc.

I am not on the papers for this adopted child. It seems that she was able to adopt the child on her own. How? I do not know. Now she is covering her tracks by claiming abandonment and inhuman treatment. That is why she is filing for divorce. I did tell my lawyer that all of this was made up because of all the commotion that I have caused by going to DSS and the courts stating that an illegal adoption took place. I am not paying for this adoopted child so they say.

Now my thing is if she left the house on her own free will with my kids placed an order of protection how is it that I have to pay a huge amount of child support and my mortgage on the basis of a pay stub that has 20 hrs OT and no benefits were being deducted for myself or the family. I do not have a problem paying child support for my kids but they have what I make on a yearly basis without OT. OT is not something that is every week. It's only when available.
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Old 04-15-2009, 10:30 AM   #57 (permalink)
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Go immediately to the court that set the child support payment. Schedule a hearing and request the support amount be amended to something reasonable. I'm not saying that the judge will let you get by with a huge mortgage payment for the place you are living in and NOT give your children the percentage of your salary that is normal for your area, so don't get the idea that it is a slam dunk. Your mortgage is your problem.
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Old 04-15-2009, 01:52 PM   #58 (permalink)
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Go immediately to the court that set the child support payment. Schedule a hearing and request the support amount be amended to something reasonable. I'm not saying that the judge will let you get by with a huge mortgage payment for the place you are living in and NOT give your children the percentage of your salary that is normal for your area, so don't get the idea that it is a slam dunk. Your mortgage is your problem.

To the poster, I apologize for the ongoing attitude you have endured in this forum. No judge has ruled that a house in which you both lived is now "your problem". Your case hasn't been settled yet. Your attorney has every right to challenge this.


And as you stated previously, it seemed that your attorney has your situation under control and intends to address this unfair assessment of your wages in court.

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My lawyer is going to challenge this. She did say that I would have to con't to pay until we go in front of a judge.
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Old 04-15-2009, 06:12 PM   #59 (permalink)
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To the poster, I apologize for the ongoing attitude you have endured in this forum. No judge has ruled that a house in which you both lived is now "your problem". Your case hasn't been settled yet. Your attorney has every right to challenge this.


And as you stated previously, it seemed that your attorney has your situation under control and intends to address this unfair assessment of your wages in court.
No need to apologize for the ignorance of others. I have a second lawyer looking into the matter. I will keep you posted. Once again, thank you for all of your help in this matter.

I have no problems with paying any support for my children. What I do have a problem with is if I will be paying for a child that is not mine.
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Old 04-16-2009, 04:55 AM   #60 (permalink)
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No need to apologize for the ignorance of others. I have a second lawyer looking into the matter. I will keep you posted. Once again, thank you for all of your help in this matter.

I have no problems with paying any support for my children. What I do have a problem with is if I will be paying for a child that is not mine.
This case could be precedent setting.

Even if she is making allegations against you to 'cover up' the adoption issue, the fact remains that it is impossible for her to document a legal separation that meets the laws time requirement in order for her alone to be able to adopt this child. I also find it personally distasteful that you are made to be the proverbial 'bad guy' because as has been so foolishly stated, "She just love the kid enough to lie".

Narcissistic, self serving, and most of all, ILLEGAL.

Please keep in touch. I think of you often and the toll this must be taking on you.
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