grandchild

yes, if someone can answer a question for me....my daughter is 14 and pregnant (due in 1/09) and i was wondering if i can get guardianship over my ganddaughter to be for legal reason and for her well being?

Any "woman" old enough to give birth to a baby retains the rights to the child ( unless, for some reason she is deemed to be unfit, or otherwise harmful to the child). I am not sure what you mean by guardianship--your young daughter lives at home, presumably, so the child will as well? If you are trying to get parental rights to the child, you will probably not be able to do so without terminating her rights in some way, and without reason, I am not sure how you would do that.

You obviously have physical (if not legal) custody of the child since by default she lives in your house ( guessing ). What is it you are attempting to do? How will having a piece of paper somewhere saying you are the guardian make a realistic practical difference in her life?

Perhaps if you can articulate what it is you mean by "for legal reasons", perhaps I can be more specific in my reply. Obviously, 14 year olds are not equipped emotionally, mentally, etc. to optimally parent a child. However, that does not mean she isn't entitled to do so until it is proven she cannot.

Grace, step up to this one. It seems she is worried that her daughter will leave her home once the baby is born. If there is a history of drugs, that might be problematic. But if it is just a liason to the wrong boy, perhaps there is nothing that can be done.

But if her daughter is only 14, is she still a dependent child... and since she is actually too young in the eyes of the law to be on her own if she has NOT had a relationship and a child, does having a child somehow emancipate her? Can her mother expect to use CPS to counsel her daughter to stay at home and finish school?

The whole point of this woman's problem is whether she can keep her daughter and granddaughter from leaving. If the father is more than two years older, most states would have him up on charges of statutory rape. This is just too young to risk having her daughter on the streets with an unsatisfactory relationship... unmarried! While I wouldn't put my daughter's sweetheart in jail over having a child, if he were 25, I might. If she just had a wild summer, she is definitely not ready for her own place at 14-15.

Huh? CPS doesn't COUNSEL people to say at home and finish school. In fact, you are assuming that because a young teen is pregnant, CPS is automatically involved. The reality is CPS has no legal right to interfere unless a report of wrong doing is made. A teen having a baby, while unfortunate, isn't a license for CPS to get involved unless other factors are present. (neglect, abuse, etc.) And no, having a child does not emancipate you. Emancipation is a distinct legal process--it doesn't automatically happen.

The balance of your posting appears to be all conjecture and speculation on things the original poster never stated. "For legal reasons" and "well being"? is very vague, which is why I asked the poster to clarify her intent instead of just guessing what she meant.

need to know what to do in the case of my 2 grandchildren that i supported an raised for 3 and half years an one for year an half mother took them back to alabama and is living in a house with no running water for over 3 months baby was hospitalized for 4 days for a cut he got on his leg that turned into a very important issue with a bad bacteria infecti0n the mother is living with her mother she does drugs towana thats mothers name is using also but don;t know how to prove it my which lives with me is the father of the children they both carry his last name he says to me he is supporting those kids he send her 5 to 7 hundred dollars a month and she has not signed the kids up for their medical and she has not carried the baby for his shots cause she does not have time what should i do as a grand parent that always provided them all with a home took special time with the kids an they are not n
ow getting the proper love an support they need please help me in minnesota
my email is lalabug2007@yahoo.com

You have no legal right to the child. If you have concerns for his/her wellbeing, you need to report it to the authorities where she lives. IF they investigate and determine the mother is not fit, or if they investigate and find it necessary to remove the children from her they generally try to place the children with family members instead of with strangers in foster care.

But, until those steps are taken, you cannot assert any claim of right to the children.

Good luck.

Conjecture it might be, but given that she wants to keep the daughter and the baby with her, the easiest way would be to turn her daughter in for the first infraction she finds. They don't tell who complained, but they get involved quickly and generally do a pretty good job of informing a new mother about the things she needs to know and do to protect her child.

Things I might not know because of my lack of experience with welfare and such, she can find out from people who direct others to seek help. I had a foster child years ago for several years until majority was reached. That child knew more about where to go and what to do than I ever will... because she was in the system. She never had to use it again until she married a bum, but at least she was prepared for that life, having grown up in the system with no mother and a father who went to jail for selling MJ to inmates in the local jail house. She was farmed out for six years in the system.

These are things you don't learn in a sheltered existence. You just don't get to know about social services without being there.

And for Dorlene, you should consider where she lives before you put your grandchildren into the system by reporting that they live without running water, but what you need to know is whether they actually HAVE social workers in a place that would allow people to live without running water. Sounds like they don't have many amenities there... but they also should not tell her who turned her in for making her kids live in squallor. Times are tough. It is going to get tougher. But any child is worth saving... only the more so because they are your grandchildren.

Let me tell you in frank terms why this is beyond ABSURD.

Reference the original posting.

FOURTEEN YEAR OLD DAUGHTER.

Let me connect the dots.

A fourteen year old daughter, one over which the poster has custody. Just because this minor aged child gave birth does not emancipate her. THIS means that if the FOURTEEN YEAR OLD is "turned in for the first infraction you can find", then that sword would cut BOTH ways---because then the MOTHER ( POSTER ) would be liable legally too since the mother of the newborn is HER responsibility as a minor also.

Understand?

If the mother of the baby is a minor and is grandmothers legal responsibility, turning the fourteen year old in would NOT ALLOW the grandmother to keep the infant---if the grandmother cannot care for a fourteen year old who is commiting acts against a child worthy of taking the child from her, then they certainly aren't going to hand the child to the grandmother---because the child would STILL be at risk because the ultimate responsibility is the grandmothers. AND the child would STILL be exposed to whatever "infractions" because the fourteen year old mother is still there living under the same roof.

BAD idea.

If the goal is to educate the fourteen year old, parenting classes would be much more effective than TATTLING to social services and run the risk of BOTH of them losing the child. They cannot TAKE the baby and give it to the grandmother--the MOTHER, as a fourteen year old minor, lives in the same house.

Grace,
Aren't you saying that if the 14 year old decides to run off with her boyfriend, that the mother cannot do anything about the daughter or the child? The mother has control until she reaches majority in that state. But once she gets married ... to the wrong man... there is nothing the mom can do. But what about her concern that the girl would run off with the guy and baby?

The real question... are you also saying in your post that the mother has control of the daughter's baby too? Since when? The daughter can disappear in a heartbeat... WITH the baby. And Momma knows it.

What might be true by law... and I doubt it... has no realistic impact on what Momma wants to protect both her child and her grandchild from... a hormonal new mother who thinks her life is either OVER or JUST GETTING STARTED... with HIM.

Come on, Grace, think outside the box. Don't give advice that MIGHT be correct in a few states, but does nothing to prevent the damage.

The only real way to control the daughter is to control the grandchild. Thus it makes MORE sense to get them both in the system with services for new mothers and checkups on her parenting ability... at home, but unable to leave with the child without getting into trouble. Grandma gets assurance that the baby will not be mistreated or malnourished at home. Neither should her daughter be mistreated or malnourished by a new relationship without sufficient funds.

First of all, the fourteen year olds mother at no time suggested any such concern. Where does she say anything about the girl running away with someone? Why are we arguing rhetorical scenarios? You state "the mother has control until she reaches majority"---which is exactly what I stated--and is precisely WHY the mother reporting the fourteen year old for the FIRST infraction she can find is a BAD idea because she is, in essence, REPORTING HERSELF.

Where did I say the grandmother has control of the baby? Are you maudlin? I said, "Obviously, 14 year olds are not equipped emotionally, mentally, etc. to optimally parent a child. However, that does not mean she isn't entitled to do so until it is proven she cannot."

Actually I didn't quote ANY states "laws". What I said was in EVERY STATE in THIS country a parent is responsible for their minor child and if the grandmother reports the mother, she is wielding a two edged sword that could come back squarely upon HER.

This ISNT creative writing.

It is LAW.

Nice WAFFLE.

First you said "report her for the first infraction" , which is NOT getting help in parenting, as I suggested. REPORTING the teenaged mother "for the first infraction" could result in the GRANDMOTHER losing BOTH the teen mother AND the baby because reporting the teen reflects on the GRANDMOTHER and HER parenting ability and judgment.