the mother is 'stealing' the child support $$

Hi there. I'm not sure if it's appropriate for me to be on this forum or not, but I'm trying to help my boyfriend with his very difficult and frustrating child support situation.
In August of '07, Megan (his daughter) was quite literally dropped off on our front door by her mother. She simply stated things were too hectic in her life and she couldn't handle taking care of Meg. She agreed to go through mediation to get the custody paperwork redone and to stop taking child support $$. So we got her enrolled in the 6th grade and tried to make the adjustments we weren't prepared for.
Ultimately, my relationship with Meg's dad ended a few months later.
Because of financial issues, her mom ended up moving in with her and her dad, all the while listing Dad as the primary caregiver.
In January of this year, Mom took Meg out of school and moved her back up to where they used to live to finish out school up there. The only way this was possible was because the mediation paperwork hadn't gotten the judge's 'stamp of approval' for it to take effect.
In June, Mom and daughter left home and moved into a women's shelter. Mom wouldn't let Meg live with Dad. Then in June, she changed her mind and quite literally dropped her off on his doorstep again. Meg's been with Dad since.
In July, Dad received a letter in the mail stating that Mom filed for back child support all the way to August of '07. He approached her on this and she claimed to go to the county and relinquish her child support rights. His wages have been garnished since August (paychecks cut in half).
He found out today from the child support office that in fact, Mom had not relinquished anything and was receiving all the money being garnished from Dad.
This is where I'm concerned. ISN'T THIS ILLEGAL?
He needs help. He can barely afford to pay rent and take care of his daughter with what little money he does have and obviously can't afford an attorney to advance this case. Is there anything he can do to show the law, the county, the state, whomever that he's had custody of his daughter for all but a few months in the past two years? How can he get his money back from Mom?

ANY advice would be greatly appreciated. Thank you for your time.

I understand and appreciate your concern, but unfortunately, recovering the money already paid is going to be well nigh impossible. The court isn't going to do the he said she said thing for a few months of payment (although its important to the person paying, it isnt nearly as appreciable to the court ). The child, obviously, is being moved around back and forth and the court dates and appearances and orders cannot keep up. The best I can suggest is try to hire an attorney if you can afford one, and if not, keep impeccable records so when it does come time to go to court, he is prepared. Fortunate for the kid that dad is willing to step in but what a sad path for the child to have to travel.
Try to contact the child support office---but until the court order that orders him to pay is changed, I am afraid he is on the hook. Even if a judge orders her to return the money, forcing her to do so would be small claims matters, something the family court is too jammed full to address.
Good luck.

I am dealing with a family court matter that has to do with child support too. Gather ALL evidence together and orginize. Go to the court and get a print-out of payment history and proof of residency for the daughter AND mother for the time in question. I would suggest filing a request for a Hearing with the court. Use a blank form that you can find free on-line from the State that you live in. You can do this on your own. We have spent over $1000. with Attorneys and got NO WHERE! Dont let the court intimidate you! Just tell the truth and stay calm! Good luck!!