01-28-2009, 08:48 AM
|
|
Senior Member
|
|
Join Date: Nov 2006
Posts: 3,504
|
|
Quote:
Originally Posted by donallie
Grace,
Aren't you saying that if the 14 year old decides to run off with her boyfriend, that the mother cannot do anything about the daughter or the child? The mother has control until she reaches majority in that state. But once she gets married ... to the wrong man... there is nothing the mom can do. But what about her concern that the girl would run off with the guy and baby?.
|
First of all, the fourteen year olds mother at no time suggested any such concern. Where does she say anything about the girl running away with someone? Why are we arguing rhetorical scenarios? You state "the mother has control until she reaches majority"---which is exactly what I stated--and is precisely WHY the mother reporting the fourteen year old for the FIRST infraction she can find is a BAD idea because she is, in essence, REPORTING HERSELF.
Quote:
Originally Posted by donallie
The real question... are you also saying in your post that the mother has control of the daughter's baby too? Since when? The daughter can disappear in a heartbeat... WITH the baby. And Momma knows it..
|
Where did I say the grandmother has control of the baby? Are you maudlin? I said, "Obviously, 14 year olds are not equipped emotionally, mentally, etc. to optimally parent a child. However, that does not mean she isn't entitled to do so until it is proven she cannot."
Quote:
Originally Posted by donallie
What might be true by law... and I doubt it... has no realistic impact on what Momma wants to protect both her child and her grandchild from... a hormonal new mother who thinks her life is either OVER or JUST GETTING STARTED... with HIM.
Come on, Grace, think outside the box. Don't give advice that MIGHT be correct in a few states, but does nothing to prevent the damage.
|
Actually I didn't quote ANY states "laws". What I said was in EVERY STATE in THIS country a parent is responsible for their minor child and if the grandmother reports the mother, she is wielding a two edged sword that could come back squarely upon HER.
This ISNT creative writing.
It is LAW.
Quote:
Originally Posted by donallie
The only real way to control the daughter is to control the grandchild. Thus it makes MORE sense to get them both in the system with services for new mothers and checkups on her parenting ability... at home, but unable to leave with the child without getting into trouble. Grandma gets assurance that the baby will not be mistreated or malnourished at home. Neither should her daughter be mistreated or malnourished by a new relationship without sufficient funds.
|
Nice WAFFLE.
First you said "report her for the first infraction" , which is NOT getting help in parenting, as I suggested. REPORTING the teenaged mother "for the first infraction" could result in the GRANDMOTHER losing BOTH the teen mother AND the baby because reporting the teen reflects on the GRANDMOTHER and HER parenting ability and judgment.
|